i'd like to say we did it for the better of

I just don't want to ever have to miss you again. I love you; I must have said those words over a thousand times, but I didn't know what they meant til the day I met you. Well... maybe not til the they I actually met you. It took me so long to fall in love with you... so many falls, so many mistakes, and tears. It took me so much to love you that I don't even know if I'm in love with you or I`'m in love with the simplicity that things have always had when it comes to us. I don't have to shower, or wear make up. I don't need no skirts or fancy dresses. I don't have to try to make you like me because you already do, and what can be simpler than that?
Until some days ago I believed that you would love me no matter what. You have said that several times, and you have even proved it. Some times everything works so well, and then it just doesn't. Yo seem to change your mind about everything, so suddenly. Don't get me wrong, i don't mind about you changing your mind about things, but I do mind you changing your mind about us, about me. I would love to have the certainty that you're not just gonna wake up tomorrow wanting more, more than I will ever be able to give you.
I bet you say the exact same thing about me, how come we're so similar and so different at the same time?
We shouldn't we having these problems. We have always known how to ignore the important things, and maybe that's what got us here. I don't have a real explanation for what we both feel for each other. I used to think that it was one of those loves that could move mountains, but I'm starting to doubt that. It doesn't matter if we cannot agree on things, cause we have always found a way to make it not matter, to make it go away, to not letting it hurt. But I believe we're running out of strategies now.
We used to make such a great team, what happened to us? We've both made mistakes. I have, and you have too. But we never let those mistakes tear us apart until now. You introduced me to myself, and when you left you took me with you. I wish I could say things are better now, I truly wish I could say we are better off without each other. I can't speak for you, but, as for my self... I want you back.

d

And here I am, a lonely girl who's only friend is this notebook, and, if I'm lucky maybe the pencil will like me too, I think we get along well though. Writing is my only passion and I'm not even good at it.

fascinantemente caótico

El flaco habla y yo me desmorono. No me interesa, no, en lo más mínimo lo que está diciendo. Crátilo y Hermogenes, Wilkins y Borges. Es tan perfecto, tan fascinantemente caótico.

sin más

Luces. No tantas. Se mueven, sí. Se mueven. Hacía tanto ya desde la última vez. No estaba sola esa vez. Me gustaría no estarlo ahora. Sé que va a volver. Estoy segura, de verdad lo estoy. No sé cómo. No sé cuándo. Quiero creer que el "cuándo" se convertirá pronto en "pronto". Sé que va a volver. No sé si volveré. Nunca estuve sola, tan sola. He estado mejor, sí. No lo voy a negar, no. Me gusta estar sola, conmigo, cerca de mi. Es difícil, lo admito. Sé que puedo though. Que es cuestión de costumbre. Que algún día, hopefully no muy lejano, voy a estar bien. Bien, sin más.

cuando tu conejo se convierte en rey de corazones

Juró amarme. Prometió nunca haber siquiera pensado en otra. Me negó todo lo que los demás dijeron. Tanto cariño me mostró que me vi obligada a creer. Tanto fue que me obligué a ponerlo incluso antes que a mis amigos. Elegí creer en él porque era más fácil, dolía menos. Menos doloroso era pensar que el resto mentía, mucho más lo era pensar que él lo hacía. Una vez que podes creer, o crees poderlo hacer, todo se vuelve más fácil. Nada es cuestionable. Si el lo dice, así es! Es ahí, cuando crees ver todo tan claro, cuando de verdad duele. Cuando te bajas de la nubecita. Cuando te das cuenta que no estas en wonderland, ni sos Alice. Cuando tu conejo se convierte en rey de corazones. Suerte que Carroll nos dio al sombrerero.
No todo lo que muerde necesariamente es un lobo, pero todos los lobos necesariamente muerden. En pocas palabras, debe haber sido fácil estar en tu lugar. "Me pintaste el pasto de azul y resultó ser verde.", sabias palabras de algún alguien que solía ser mi amigo. Resulta que tuvo razón todo este tiempo, pero yo no lo quise ver.

vos

Tu voz me saca de mis casillas. Rompe hasta el último átomo de pensamiento lógico que me queda. Suprimís el sentido común de todos mis esquemas. Todo rastro de coherencia desaparece y lo único que queda en mi sos vos.

totally into it...

"Just because you have long hair and are willing to dip it in paint and whip it around, flinging paint everywhere, doesn't mean you should." 
THAT COMING FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS NEVER DONE IT, THOSE PEOPLE JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO HAVE FUN!! Maybe the mere fact that you can, means you should.